Please honey, act your age!
Sunday, July 04, 2004
Peculiar: 12 year old girls on the beach trying to look like they’re 21 or older in order to attract the attention of 21+ year old lecherous men.
Why do young girls insist on trying to rush into situations where their bodies are valued more than their brains or ambitions? I was at the beach today for the fourth of july - there were many many things worth mentioning (including the need for a ban on speedos as well as a regulation requiring waxing for all hairy men) but today we’ll just mention the prepubescent female need to look like Britney or Beyonce. It’s strange because, being that it’s a beach where society keeps grown women more focused on maintaining a prepubescent look, it’s very difficult to tell the teeny-boppers and the “blossomed” women apart.
Why would you wanna rush into a world where men ogle and try to take advantage of you? Where they grab and molest? Is that flattering? Is that something you *really* want to experience at 12? All i can say is, “THANK YOU VERY MUCH, MS. SPEARS! A POX ON YOUR HOUSE! I HOPE THAT YOUR LITTLE SISTER BECOMES ...” No, that’s just wrong. I won’t go there.
Anyway, if you’re 12 and reading this, WAIT UNTIL YOU’RE THE RIGHT AGE TO BE GROPED AND SEXUALLY HARRASSED! Oh, it’s worth the wait...
I think you can safely group these tantalizing toddlers with the sagging sirens or aging hipsters. Everyone’s trying to be 26.
Wait… we’re 26… so what’re we trying to be?
Posted by Slim on 08/03 at 12:37 AM