Most recent entries
Experiment 2: Strengths Finder 2.0
Good God!
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Many think of NYC as a city of sin (or at least a location of ample opportunity to find sin), but if anything, moving here has really put me in a position to rely on God.
Often times God’s working shows up in relatively small incidents, but really the fact that they are small moments only reinforces that fact that God is really good. If he chooses to take care of the most piddly of my problems, I know I have nothing to fear about when it comes to the big things.
So here were my piddly problems:
Problem 1
I had gotten called out in class – my professor pointed me out at the end of a lecture regarding our readings, saying pointedly, “Kathy, you don’t understand this do you?” or something to that effect which was followed by me trying to verbally dig myself out of the hole my non-verbal communication of distress had dug. “Oh, me? No…I get it…as far as it can be gotten at this point in time…er…” I began to stress hardcore because I did not want to be labeled as “The Dumb One” or “The Slacker Who Never Reads For My Class” or “The One Who Reads But Just Doesn’t Understand Anyway.”
Problem 2
I am coming home for Thanksgiving after all because of a friend’s wedding. So I booked a ticket to come home on the 20th of November. This means that I am skipping class. Three (3) classes to be exact. One of them is the same professor that is mentioned in Problem 1. And with that experience looming over my head, the need to rectify that situation, and the need to ask permission to sort of blow off her class, I considered not even asking but just not showing up for that class. I wanted to hide and be dishonest, but I knew I couldn’t do that. That’s just a bad habit. Needless to say, I was a nervous wreck all day Monday.
The Solution
I prayed constantly all day. I realized fully that I hadn’t even consulted God on the Thanksgiving thing. Was it even a good idea? Doh. Forgot to ask. So I asked for mercy so that even if I made a mistake that it would resolve well somehow.
With prayer in mind, I went to class that night. Lo and behold, the discussion went somewhere that I could understand! And I was able to comment intelligently about a point that the professor kept referring back to during the rest of the class. Then after class I managed to get up the gumption to ask about Thanksgiving break. While I was talking, she actually smiled about the wedding and told me that it would be fine. I don’t mean to imply that she is not a kind person, but it’s difficult to tell someone that you made plans to specifically miss their class.
These things may seem small, but to me they meant the world on Monday! I had literally stressed all day about the situation! If my prayer was answered by merely giving me insight and gumption to talk, then for that I am thankful. I think there was some heart-softening going on too, though.
Bottom line: God is good.